We're the Millers

By Jared Young

Mailed on August 15, 2013


Stamp image Return to
Sender
StarHalf StarEmpty StarEmpty StarEmpty Star

Dear Mary Sunshine
Production Accountant

Dear Mary,

Re: Form-7DA Generic Deduction(s) Request

On the basis of the information and affidavits submitted with the 2013 benefits return filed in your name on behalf of the filmed entertainment previously qualified for public consumption under the title "We're The Millers" (pr. BenderSpink/New Line/Vincent Newman Entertainment), we would like to inform you, pursuant to an examination of the supplied documentation, that your claim has been accepted for the following deductions for the category comedy, sub-categor(ies) gross-out, stoner, anarchic:

(1) Aimless and aloof stoner doofus who learns the value of kindness and acquaintance despite acting like total asshole for majority of film.

(2) Popular actress's mid-career gambit to prolong sex-symbol status by flaunting yoga-hardened body (compromised by lack of rhythm to slightly mortifying effect).

(3) Prosthetic genitals, monstrously swollen by exotic bug-bite.

(4) Sass-mouthed gutter-rat who, stripped of baggy clothing and dark eye makeup, is revealed to be wholesome Middle-American teenage girl (see also Item 1. re: lessons in kindness and acquaintance).

(5) Popular character actor from cult TV series in supporting role playing vaguely dissimilar version of popular character from cult TV series (a) to much lesser effect and (b) with a sort of half-embarrassed expression the entire time.

(6) Notable supporting performances that (i) almost make bloated 110-minute run-time worthwhile, and/or (ii) make you wish the whole movie was about them instead (spec: Poulter, Will; Hahn, Kathryn).

(7) Karaoke sequence set to mid-90s R&B hit that preys on fast-expiring decade-of-the-moment nostalgia.

Please note: the abovementioned items are considered standard deductions, and will not protect you or any entity associated with the production of this motion picture for liabilities related to the net operating loss abetting the generous penurious quality, both objective and subjective, of this venture.

If you have any questions, please fill out the necessary forms and submit them through your certified notary.

Sincerely,

Jared

Senior Auditor, DCAC

comments powered by Disqus
(% endraw %}