2018 Silver Stamps

By Dear Cast & Crew

Mailed on December 31, 2018

Dear Readers,

Another cinematic year in the books, and maybe we’ve actually turned a page in 2018.

For the first time since we started the Silver Stamps in 2012, the world’s best living cinematographer didn’t make a film, leaving us unable to give Roger Deakins his Award for Excellence in Being Rogers Deakins (he’ll have to settle for having finally won an Oscar). But a lot has also changed since that time when the sky fell from a cloud atlas on a unexpected journey. Here are a list of the moments and movies we loved and loathed, the people worth praising and the half-ass efforts worth heckling.

Best Wayne’s World Homage: Mike Myers in Bohemian Rhapsody

Worst Wayne’s World Homage: Mark Rylance in Ready Player One

Most Deliberate Jumping-of-the-Shark: The Meg

Least Deliberate Jumping-of-the-Shark: Ocean’s 8

Best Performance by Dwayne Johnson Fighting Larger Than Life Threats: Tie: Rampage, Skyscraper

Worst Movie to Squeak a Fart Out During: A Quiet Place

Best Movie to Squeak a Fart Out During: Happy Time Murders

Midnight Movie Award (Best Theatrical Experience): Mandy

Matinee Movie Award (For Ages 65+): Finding Your Feet

Any Time You’re Bored at Home Award (Presented by Netflix): Set It Up

Achievement in Selling Distribution Rights to Streaming Giant to Save Face (Also Presented by Netflix): The Cloverfield Paradox (Runner Up: Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle)

Incompetent Producer Award for Not Being Able to Sell a Film with Sex Spies and A-List Nudity: Red Sparrow

Incomparable Producer Award for Being Able to Sell a Film with an All-Asian Cast and no A-Listers: Crazy Rich Asians

Most Confusing Title For a Remake or Sequel: Tie: Halloween, The Predator, Fahrenheit 11/9

The Mummy Award for Killing a Franchise Before it Even Got Started: Robin Hood

Riskiest Music Cue: "Yellow" in Crazy Rich Asians

Safest Music Cue: "Take On Me" in Ready Player One

Sickest Music Cue: "King’s Dead" in Black Panther

Best Musical Performance: Topo the Octopus in Aquaman

Best Publicity Stunt: Avengers: Infinity War (ending)

Best Stunts for Publicity: Mission: Impossible - Fallout

Worst Original Ballad: "I’ll Never Love Again" by Lady Gaga in A Star is Born

Best Original Ballad: "Ashes" by Celine Dion in Deadpool 2

Monty Python Tribute Award for Acting Without Arms or Legs: Harry Melling in The Ballad of Buster Scruggs

5th Annual Award for Excellence in Bridgearian Acting: Jeff Bridges, Bad Times at the El Royale

Best Stunt Driving: Tom Cruise, Mission: Impossible - Fallout

Worst Stunt Driving: Marina De Tavira: Roma

Film with the Best Food Porn: Tie: Crazy Rich Asians, Bao

Worst Use of White Saviour Trope: Green Book

Best Use of White Saviour Trope: Blackkklansman

1st Annual Can We All Just Agree That Toni Collette is Gotdam Brilliant Award: Toni Collette, Hereditary

Best Film to be Unfairly Screwed Over by a Studio Then Forgotten Completely: Annihilation


Dear Cast & Crew

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